How to Not Die of Loneliness During the Holidays When You Can’t Go Home

Sometimes the hardest part of the holidays is the fact that you live eight hours away from family and can’t afford to go home.

I didn’t quite know how much I’d struggle my first year away from Florida. Sure, I had lived away from home during college, a whole one hour and forty-five minutes away, but moving to Wake Forest was my first time living in a different state than my family and childhood friends for an extended amount of time. Through my time here, God has shown me more than I ever expected (or, at times, wanted!). Here’s a few ways I’ve learned to enjoy different kinds of holiday seasons through my fair share of moping, crying, and making do. Maybe you’ll start to see the fun and adventure constrained circumstances can actually afford during the holidays!

1. Build a Community Where You Are

Make new friends. When my parents and I first unloaded a U-Haul of furniture, clothes, books, and whatever else I deemed necessary to life here in Wake Forest, I knew absolutely no one.

No contacts. No friends. Nada. So I know how awkward and exhausting it can be to make new friends in a place where you have zero history.
 I felt like I couldn’t be frustrated or have a bad day. New people wouldn’t know that I wasn’t being normal Lindsey, but grouchy Lindsey, or really, really, tired Lindsey, or hangry (so hungry you angry!) Lindsey. What if people thought that’s how I acted all the time?

The crazy thing that I had to learn is that if you want a history with someone, be it a friend or mentor or church, you have to build it. And building a history takes time and effort, so don’t give up or expect too much too soon. Pray that God would provide a solid, biblical church where you fit in—you’ll need people from all walks of life beside you—and other women to walk alongside. Then go out and make friends. Go to your church’s events. Talk to people. Invite them to coffee or over for a movie. And most importantly, learn to listen. Ask others about themselves and be genuinely interested in what they have to say.

If you want to be here, really be here, then you have to build a community. Otherwise, all you’ll do is think about home, call friends every chance you get, and be so lonely here you won’t want to stay.

P.S.—Trust me, it gets easier. You’ll make friends, good friends you wouldn’t trade for anything. You’ll grow (more than you thought possible), and you’ll see God provide for you in ways you didn’t know you’d need.

Invite others in. Once you have your people, your new friends, always continue inviting others in.

I know, you might get jealous or worry maybe your friend will like them and ditch  you—you get all, you know, defense-mode. I’ve had other girls act that way towards me when I was apparently getting too close to their friend, and I’ve acted that way before, too. But don’t be like that. Not only does it make you look both immature and insecure, it also doesn’t reflect the biblical picture of community we see in scripture.

Be hospitable—genuinely welcome others into your life.

(And, no, this does not mean you have to be BFFs with every person out there. But you do need to be friendly and show them the same love that has been shown to you.)

2. Start Your Own Traditions

Decorate! Maybe this is obvious, but if you’re not going home for a holiday or only get to go home for a few days, decorate your apartment! Hit the Goodwill or local thrift shops around town and find a few decorations to help your apartment feel festive. Make your little home warm and inviting, even if only for yourself and roommates. Y’all know Pinterest has all sorts of fun, inexpensive ideas to decorate: don’t just pin ‘em, make ‘em! And if you have extras you don’t want or won’t use, pass them on to others.

Celebrate! You’re in a new place with new people—how exciting! Start your own new traditions! This could either mean incorporating your family’s traditions, like a favorite movie while cooking together or decorating with your new friends (while also letting them introduce you to their special family traditions), or it could mean starting something completely new altogether. Google local events going on in the area, and then go explore! Find a swanky little coffee shop you’ve never been to and enjoy a cup of Pumpkin Latte or Peppermint Mocha together. Have a picnic of cocoa and treats in the park. The possibilities here are just about as endless as your own creativity. Get out and do something!

3. Keep Perspective 

As amazing and unbelievable as this might seem, whatever your life looks like this holiday season, well, it probably won’t look the same come this time next year.  Maybe you or a friend will move to another city or a different apartment. Maybe you’ll get married or have a baby. Or maybe you (or your husband) will graduate and find ministry work elsewhere. You never know what this upcoming year might hold. So don’t take what you have here, right now, for granted. As Trace Adkins once sang, “You’re gonna miss this”: the ridiculously small apartment, the even smaller budget, and the community of other seminarians (just as poor and cramped as you!) just trying to be faithful and prepare well while living their lives together one ordinary day at a time. You only get so many Easters, Thanksgivings and Christmases here—don’t waste a single one! Your God is sovereign and aware of where you are. Be where He has you, even if it’s not where He’s going to keep you.

Lindsey Pope is a 2011 graduate of the University of Florida (Go Gators!) and is currently pursuing her M.Div in Christian Ministry. At the age of sixteen, she was called into Christian ministry; that same year she met two women, one in her twenties and the other in her forties, both pursuing their M.Divs. It was then that she first started dreaming of seminary.

How to Not Die of Loneliness During the Holidays When You Can’t Go Home

Sometimes the hardest part of the holidays is the fact that you live eight hours away from family and can’t afford to go home.

I didn’t quite know how much I’d struggle my first year away from Florida. Sure, I had lived away from home during college, a whole one hour and forty-five minutes away, but moving to Wake Forest was my first time living in a different state than my family and childhood friends for an extended amount of time. Through my time here, God has shown me more than I ever expected (or, at times, wanted!). Here’s a few ways I’ve learned to enjoy different kinds of holiday seasons through my fair share of moping, crying, and making do. Maybe you’ll start to see the fun and adventure constrained circumstances can actually afford during the holidays!

1. Build a Community Where You Are

Make new friends. When my parents and I first unloaded a U-Haul of furniture, clothes, books, and whatever else I deemed necessary to life here in Wake Forest, I knew absolutely no one.
No contacts. No friends. Nada. So I know how awkward and exhausting it can be to make new friends in a place where you have zero history.
 I felt like I couldn’t be frustrated or have a bad day. New people wouldn’t know that I wasn’t being normal Lindsey, but grouchy Lindsey, or really, really, tired Lindsey, or hangry (so hungry you angry!) Lindsey. What if people thought that’s how I acted all the time?

The crazy thing that I had to learn is that if you want a history with someone, be it a friend or mentor or church, you have to build it. And building a history takes time and effort, so don’t give up or expect too much too soon. Pray that God would provide a solid, biblical church where you fit in—you’ll need people from all walks of life beside you—and other women to walk alongside. Then go out and make friends. Go to your church’s events. Talk to people. Invite them to coffee or over for a movie. And most importantly, learn to listen. Ask others about themselves and be genuinely interested in what they have to say.

If you want to be here, really be here, then you have to build a community. Otherwise, all you’ll do is think about home, call friends every chance you get, and be so lonely here you won’t want to stay.

P.S.—Trust me, it gets easier. You’ll make friends, good friends you wouldn’t trade for anything. You’ll grow (more than you thought possible), and you’ll see God provide for you in ways you didn’t know you’d need.

Invite others in. Once you have your people, your new friends, always continue inviting others in.

I know, you might get jealous or worry maybe your friend will like them and ditch  you—you get all, you know, defense-mode. I’ve had other girls act that way towards me when I was apparently getting too close to their friend, and I’ve acted that way before, too. But don’t be like that. Not only does it make you look both immature and insecure, it also doesn’t reflect the biblical picture of community we see in scripture.

Be hospitable—genuinely welcome others into your life.

(And, no, this does not mean you have to be BFFs with every person out there. But you do need to be friendly and show them the same love that has been shown to you.)

2. Start Your Own Traditions

Decorate! Maybe this is obvious, but if you’re not going home for a holiday or only get to go home for a few days, decorate your apartment! Hit the Goodwill or local thrift shops around town and find a few decorations to help your apartment feel festive. Make your little home warm and inviting, even if only for yourself and roommates. Y’all know Pinterest has all sorts of fun, inexpensive ideas to decorate: don’t just pin ‘em, make ‘em! And if you have extras you don’t want or won’t use, pass them on to others.

Celebrate! You’re in a new place with new people—how exciting! Start your own new traditions! This could either mean incorporating your family’s traditions, like a favorite movie while cooking together or decorating with your new friends (while also letting them introduce you to their special family traditions), or it could mean starting something completely new altogether. Google local events going on in the area, and then go explore! Find a swanky little coffee shop you’ve never been to and enjoy a cup of Pumpkin Latte or Peppermint Mocha together. Have a picnic of cocoa and treats in the park. The possibilities here are just about as endless as your own creativity. Get out and do something!

3. Keep Perspective 

As amazing and unbelievable as this might seem, whatever your life looks like this holiday season, well, it probably won’t look the same come this time next year.  Maybe you or a friend will move to another city or a different apartment. Maybe you’ll get married or have a baby. Or maybe you (or your husband) will graduate and find ministry work elsewhere. You never know what this upcoming year might hold. So don’t take what you have here, right now, for granted. As Trace Adkins once sang, “You’re gonna miss this”: the ridiculously small apartment, the even smaller budget, and the community of other seminarians (just as poor and cramped as you!) just trying to be faithful and prepare well while living their lives together one ordinary day at a time. You only get so many Easters, Thanksgivings and Christmases here—don’t waste a single one! Your God is sovereign and aware of where you are. Be where He has you, even if it’s not where He’s going to keep you.

Lindsey Pope is a 2011 graduate of the University of Florida (Go Gators!) and is currently pursuing her M.Div in Christian Ministry. At the age of sixteen, she was called into Christian ministry; that same year she met two women, one in her twenties and the other in her forties, both pursuing their M.Divs. It was then that she first started dreaming of seminary.

For the month of February, Walking Worthy will be dedicated to the celebration of Black History Month. 

We have loved the Casual Conversations and intentional emphasis that Southeastern has devoted to diversity on our campus and in our churches. This month, we will continue the discussion with posts from students and faculty. 

We serve the incredible God who created the entire universe.  As creatures made in the image of God, we have the ability to reflect our great God in the things that we create. Today's guest post is from talented C@SE student Shaq Hardy. He uses his passion for the Lord and the creativity of the spoken word to share the Gospel and his story. Be sure to watch the video of his performance at the end of the post!

My name is Shaquille Hardy, and I am majoring in Christian studies and English with a minor in theology at the College @ Southeastern. I am a spoken word poet. I've now been performing as a spoken word artist for almost three years. 

Spoken word poetry has become a popular form of art in main stream media over the past few years, but the art form itself has been around for years. It actually dates back to the ancient Greeks. Modern day spoken word, however, dates back to the Harlem Renaissance, also known as the 'New Negro Movement.' After the abolition of slavery, the Harlem Renaissance movement birthed new forms of expression in music, art, and poetry that expanded from the African-American community in the northern United States. The movement would rapidly spread throughout the world during the First World War. Today's spoken word poetry was birthed out of this movement. 

Spoken word poetry is written, but it is usually performed with a focus on the actual words and the artist's gestures and facial expressions. This form of poetry usually tells a story of some sort - usually something that the poet has experienced or something they are passionate about. It is often quite personal and meant to evoke some sort of emotion in the audience. 

The video in this post is from my second ever performance. In this performance, there are two stories being told: the story of God and a piece of my testimony. The performance then moves to how we should respond in light of what God has done for us. Enjoy!

The Christmas season is upon us!  For the next few weeks, Walking Worthy will bring you posts full of Christmas traditions from our very own Southeastern family.  To kick off this series, Leah Finn will share one of her family’s traditions: Jesse Tree ornaments.  Read on, dear sisters!

Christmas is a special time of celebrating the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and looking forward to his second coming.  One of the ways my family is building anticipation for Christmas and Christ’s eventual return is through the use of Jesse Tree ornaments.  

The name and basis for the Jesse Tree is found in Isaiah 11:1-3:

“There shall come forth a shoot from the stump of Jesse and a branch from his roots shall bear fruit.  And the Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him, the Spirit of wisdom and understanding, the Spirit of counsel and might, the Spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord.  And his delight shall be in the fear of the Lord.  He shall not judge by what his eyes see, or decide disputes by what his ears hear.”

The Jesse Tree tells the story of redemption and God’s plan to redeem the world from the very beginning of time.  This plan is traced through key figures in Jesus’ “family tree” and other stories.  It is portrayed in basic symbols/ornaments that remind you of the story. On each day leading up to December 25, a new ornament is put out, and a scripture passage is read to explain the story.

The visual symbols along with repeated telling of the grand narrative of Scripture help to focus our hearts on Christ during the Christmas season.  Children especially resonate with basic, colorful ornaments that symbolize different parts of the greatest story of all time—i.e., a whale for Jonah, a crown for King David, or three gifts for the wise men.

This year, I participated in a Jesse Tree Ornament Swap with several other ladies in the Wake Forest area.  We followed the storyline explained at this site.  

{If you have a chance to peruse this site, it contains many helpful suggestions for incorporating your Jesse Tree into your daily rhythm, as well as an e-book with a devotional guide for each day of the Jesse Tree.  You can also find a devotional guide and printable ornaments to follow the devotional guide.

In addition, the Jesus Storybook Bible has a schedule of reading that is very similar to the Jesse Tree.  I would encourage you to find something that works for your family!  (There are many Jesse Tree or Advent readings that you can follow.  For the most part they are the same, but there might be differences in order or in what stories are included.)}  

Each person participating in the Wake Forest Jesse Tree Ornament Swap picked a story/symbol and then made 26 copies of the same ornament.  Shortly before Thanksgiving, all of the ornaments were ‘swapped,’ and each participant now has a full set of Jesse Tree ornaments without having to make all of them!

The ornament my family and I made represents Queen Esther.  My older children helped me to paint the ornament bases (simple wooden circles that we purchased in bulk), I stenciled on the crown and the scepter, and my kids “bejeweled” them.  It was a fun craft project, and they feel a sense of ownership of the ornaments.  

It was such a treat to receive the complete set, and to see how everyone interpreted their chosen symbol.  The different types of materials used and the variations between beautifully simple and elaborately detailed make this quite a colorful collection.  We will not be setting up a real tree for the ornaments, though that is an option.  We will be hanging our ornaments from cord strung across our fireplace—a place of prominence, easily viewed and therefore easily remembered.

You may feel like it is too late to begin a Jesse Tree now, but it is easy to catch up on the readings by doubling up for a few days (we will be doing that ourselves, as December caught us off guard).  You do not have to make ornaments if that is not your inclination, but you may find it to be a fun family activity. Take a few minutes to search for “Printable Jesse Tree ornaments” and you will find many sets that you can print and have your kids color.  What a fun way to get the kids involved in telling the story! If you are new to the Jesse Tree tradition and would like a jump-start, you can even purchase ornaments here. 

I hope that this Advent season will be one of great anticipation, of celebrating the birth of our Savior, of looking forward to his return, and of teaching our children the greatest story ever told.

It's the most wonderful time of the year! We have released the applications for the Craft and Bake sale (and I can hear many of you rejoicing and exclaiming, "Finally!!") Here is a testimony from one of last year's vendors, Jared Ownby:

The SEBTS Craft & Bake Sale was a great time for me to promote, sell, and meet lots of people. I roast, package, and sell coffee as a hobby business, but that day I sold pour-over coffee by the cup as well. 

If I still lived in the SEBTS area I would definitely participate again. I wish I had that kind of opportunity here in Tennessee before Christmas!

Do you make or bake something people might want to buy? Sign up and participate! You can download an application here.

Did you participate last year? Comment below and let us know what you sold! If you came by to shop, comment with what your favorite purchase was!

As you know, this summer’s Wednesday blog posts will feature SEBTS women, what they’re doing, and where they’re serving.  Seeing as there are only a handful of Wednesdays in the months of June & July (9 to be exact) and there are more than nine SEBTS women out there serving this summer, we thought we’d do a little something special on Fun Fridays to showcase what you’re doing and where you’re serving!!

May we introduce to you:

 Flat Stella

Many of you are familiar with Flat Stanley, the little paper guy that has become so popular in schools these days.  You know, he pops up here there because people take pictures with him to showcase where they are and what life is like there.

We’ve decided to do our own version. Here’s how it works:

We’ll carry around a Flat Stella all summer and snap a quick photo of what we’re doing and where we’re going as the WLO. We want you to do the same! We’re including a plain picture of Flat Stella below that you can print off or use on your phone. We want you to snap a quick pic of Stella with you wherever you’re serving this summer and then email it to us at womenslifeblog@sebts.edu or share it to our Facebook page  (www.facebook.com/sebtswomenslife). Every Friday, we’ll post your photos to our blog, so we can see where all of our girls are this summer! (Remember: Only send us the picture if you’re giving us permission to post it to our blog…our blog is public).

We can’t wait to see where you are & what you’re doing!  Remember, any work that you are doing for the Lord is worthy, so if you’re wiping baby bottoms or trecking through the bush, nothing is too big or small to qualify!

Happy snapping!!





Spring is such a beautiful season, and it is the season for my favorite holiday: Easter. On this Fun (Good) Friday just before Easter, we wanted to share a few ideas with y'all to help you celebrate our risen Lord this weekend. Enjoy!

For Families

If you’re looking for a creative way to share the Easter story with your kiddos, consider trying Resurrection Cookies this year.  Each ingredient in these yummy cookies can be related to the story of Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection.  They bake overnight (with the oven off!) and are hollow in the morning-just like Jesus’ empty tomb!  Click on the picture below for a link to the full recipe.

Source: littlepageturners.blogspot.com via Megan on Pinterest

For Singles

If you will be staying in Wake Forest this Easter instead of traveling to visit family, why not celebrate with your Sisters who are also here?  Invite two or three friends over for High Tea on Easter Sunday and enjoy one another’s company.  You don’t have to make a big fuss over it, but be sure to have tea (sweet tea if it has warmed up enough or hot tea if the temperature is still low . . . or both!) and a little snack food.  Use the tea time to reminisce about the good things that God has already done for you this year or over the past few years.  He is such a good Father!

Source: squidoo.com via Megan on Pinterest

For All of Us

Easter is such a time of joy; why not spend extra time today singing to the Lord who rose from the dead?  Sing as a family, sing during your “quiet time,” sing in the car.  Sing songs of joy and praise.  Be sure to pay attention to the words that you sing and let the grace of our Savior wash over you.  Maybe you’ll even find yourself dancing as you celebrate who God is and all that He has done for us.  Here are a few song ideas to get you started: